


a song about you.

by kams_xx



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Alternate Universe - College/University, Alternate Universe - Music, Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Anime, Canon - Anime, College, F/M, Falling In Love, Fanfiction, Haikyuu - Freeform, Love, Love Confessions, Love Triangles, Love at First Sight, Mild Language, Mild Sexual Content, Mild Smut, Music, Musician Semi Eita, POV Alternating, Reader-Insert, Semi Eita-centric, Swearing, haikyuu fanfiction, semi eita - Freeform, y/n
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-10 16:47:49
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 18
Words: 12,327
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28150389
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kams_xx/pseuds/kams_xx
Summary: "𝐖𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐟 𝐰𝐞 𝐬𝐭𝐚𝐲 𝐫𝐞𝐚𝐥𝐥𝐲 𝐠𝐨𝐨𝐝 𝐟𝐫𝐢𝐞𝐧𝐝𝐬"*  ⊹ ˚  .⊹  ·  ✧  ** ·"𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐝𝐨𝐧'𝐭 𝐦𝐞𝐚𝐧 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭"a reader x semi eita fan fictionP L A Y L I S T01 spirit cold // tall heights02 big jet plane // angus + julia stone03 lost in the light // bahamas04 wide eyes // local natives05 (if you're wondering if I want you) I want you // weezer06 infinite high // panama wedding07 july // noah cyrus08 stonecold // machineheart09 pawner // polar bear club10 slow and steady // of monsters + men11 heather // conan gray12 downtown // majical cloudz13 are you bored yet // wallows + clairo14 bloom // paper kites15 daddy issues // the neighborhood16 when the party's over // billie eilish17 on the shore // slow skies18 i will follow you into the dark // death cab for cutieeach chapter will go back + forth between your POV + semi's POV.* note: all characters have been aged up // basing kind of off the manga ages rather than the anime ages - pls keep in mind.I do not own haikyuu or any of its characters.
Relationships: Semi Eita/Reader
Kudos: 19





	1. 01

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓼𝓹𝓲𝓻𝓲𝓽 𝓬𝓸𝓵𝓭 - 𝓽𝓪𝓵𝓵 𝓱𝓮𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽𝓼

"What are you listening to?"

You stared at my notebook. Nothing was coming to you. Why does this keep happening? You haven't moved from this spot on campus for a little over an hour, and you've been staring at blank pages. You wanted to bang your head against the tree you were leaning up against out of frustration. There was no point in trying to force words onto the page if you didn't feel anything. 

A hand waved in front of your face.

Your gaze slowly begins to look up, and you see an ashy blonde bending over, just staring at you, while mouthing words. You take off your headphones.

"Hi. You. What are you listening to?" The way he spoke intimidated you. 

You hesitate. A million thoughts running through your mind, but you keep circling back to why is he talking to me.

You tell him quietly, slightly embarrassed.

He lets out a small laugh and takes a seat in front you, crossing one leg over the other while leaning on his knee. There was something about him that made you nervous. He seemed confident enough to sit down with you, and try talking to you. You weren't quite sure how to go about having a conversation with him, especially since you were clueless as to why this was even happening. 

"Can I listen?" He asked, as he holds out one hand. Your heart skips a beat. You see no other option, and hand him a headphone.

You try to ignore the fact that he was sitting with you, listening to your music. You stare down at your notebook, tapping the edge of the page with your pen. You couldn't think of a single word before, and now, there was no way you would be able concentrate on what to write. What was he doing here?

You took a peek from under your eye lashes, but he wasn't looking at you. He was still in the same position, but with his head leaning against the arm he had laying across his knee. His eyes were closed, as if taking in everything he was listing to. He was honestly attractive to look at. 

You could feel your face start to burn up. Your mind is telling you to stop, and focus. You do not need this distraction right now.

You decided to go back to writing, or at least try to. You flipped a few pages back in your notebook, thinking, maybe, something will come to you by looking at your past work. There had to be something from your past that could guide you - you had to have written something decent before everything happened ...

Your eyes widen. His hand was now on your notebook, not allowing you to turn any more pages.

He was leaning over, his deep brown eyes quickly glazing over the pages. His fingers started to trace along each line.

"Are these poems?" He asked, eyes still glued to the pages, while yours on his face. He looked almost angry because of his scowl, but you knew of him. It's how he usually looked. It still intimidated you though.

"Lyrics, actually," you said softly, with an embarrassed tone again. Your eyes shifted to the side to avoid eye contact.

There's something about him. You can't quite put your finger on it. Why is he talking to me. You try to shake the thought once more. It's not like guys are foreign to you. You have guy friends, you've had boyfriends. But it's always been through a mutual acquaintance.

No one has ever gone out of their way to meet you. No one has ever been interested in you.

He leaned backwards on his palms, and let out another small laugh.

"You don't need to be embarrassed about that. From what I can see, you write really well. I'm assuming you sing them?" He asked with a smirk. 

You were taken aback. "Why are you asking?"

He started to stand up and grab his bag. His tall build towered over you, and he did this thing with his tongue where he ran it over a couple of his teeth. You could feel the heat in your cheeks again as you thought of how alluring that one small movement was. But his demeanor was almost like he knew something that you didn't, and he wasn't sure if he should tell you. Which, he probably shouldn't have, since it ended up mortifying you.

"I heard you earlier."


	2. 02

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓫𝓲𝓰 𝓳𝓮𝓽 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝓷𝓮 - 𝓪𝓷𝓰𝓾𝓼 + 𝓳𝓾𝓵𝓲𝓪 𝓼𝓽𝓸𝓷𝓮

"It was quiet. But I could still hear you."

She froze. I could tell she didn't expect me to say anything. Her cheeks started to turn a light pink. Cute. 

When I heard her, I didn't expect to walk over. But I couldn't stop myself. It sounded familiar, like I heard the voice before. She was leaning against a tree on campus, her legs stretched out, crossed, in front of her. She was looking down at a notebook. Her long (h/c) hair covered part of her face. It was like she was lost.

I rubbed the back of my neck and looked away. She obviously wasn't expecting anyone to hear her. Feeling bad, I started to apologize for intruding, but I heard it. A faint voice.

"I forget that I'm not alone.." she said delicately, trailing off. Her cheeks were still pink, but she was smiling. It was almost unnoticeable, but it was there. What was it about her?

I couldn't stop looking at her. The way her hair framed her face, and her (e/c) eyes stared back at me. It was only a few seconds, but I felt as I though we stared at each other's eyes for too long. It wasn't uncomfortable, but I felt almost frozen.

That's when her lips parted.

"(l/n) (f/n)." She smiled. Her features softened, and the dimples in her cheeks were pronounced. The rosiness of her cheeks added to her smile. She all of a sudden bit her lower lip. I couldn't help but stare. She was incredibly beautiful ...

"Semi. Eita." I said before shuffling through my bag. Nerves were starting to take over. I tore a piece of paper and wrote down my number quickly. "Here."

Y/n took the piece of paper, gently grazing her finger tips against mine. I felt heat start to rise from the touch to my face. All at once, I was the one who was too embarrassed to look at her. 

"Call me.. or text me. Either way I want to see you again." And I walked away before I could hear an answer.

What just happened? Everything went smoothly until she smiled. I couldn't think straight. I couldn't even look at her after we barely touched. I probably looked like a complete idiot, just walking away like that. What is wrong with me?

I wanted to know more about her though, more about her songs and the way she's able to convert her thoughts and emotions into music. And more importantly, I wanted to see her smile again. 

I had made it to the other side of campus before I heard my phone go off. I rummaged through my bag trying to find where I put my phone. I pulled it out, hoping it was her, only to be disappointed to see it was just another girl asking why I was late to our date.

Shit.


	3. 03

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓵𝓸𝓼𝓽 𝓲𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓵𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓽 - 𝓫𝓪𝓱𝓪𝓶𝓪𝓼

You stared at it.

You couldn't stop staring it. You haven't stopped staring at to, to be honest.

At this point, it was pinned to your board above your desk. You twirled around in your chair, making yourself dizzy. Your thoughts were filled with today.

What was that?

It was such a strange interaction. While you were internally having a slight panic attack as to why Semi would be remotely interested in anything about you, he gave you his number ... and ran away from you.

He wants you to text him.

You shook your head. You've noticed Semi around campus, but never talked to him before today. You've seen him with other girls. This was probably just another one of those interactions. It wasn't that he used girls, or dated around. Girls were just interested in him. He was athletic, he was in a band. And there was no denying he was very attractive.

Your mind started to wander as you thought about how your fingers could get intertwined in that ashy blonde messy hair of his...

You shook your head and fell onto a pillow, screaming into it. Flipping over, you could feel your heart pounding. You haven't felt this way in a while.

Part of you felt excited. Someone like Semi, somehow finding some interest in you. You knew you had something to talk about. Music. He played, and you wrote. You had seen him at open mics on the weekends when you were out. He was amazing at what he did.

You started to remember the night a few months ago when you went to the bar with a couple of your friends. At the time, one of them was dating the drummer, so you couldn't deny part of you was hoping to connect with one of the other members. You would have something in common with them, and it would be easy since this is usually how it went for you. Your friends would always tell someone about you, and then introduce you to them. You'd essentially miss the uncomfortable talking stage of the relationship, and almost immediately hit it off without having to say much. Still, you were out drinking with your friends, so you knew it would be effortless for you.

You wish you didn't need alcohol to make it easier to meet people. But you're not exactly the outgoing type.

However, you never met anyone. At least from what you can remember. You can remember taking shots with your friends as the band played one of their last songs. Your memories were a little blurred from that night, but from what your friends told you, it was fun while it lasted.

Blood rushed to your cheeks and you buried your face in your hands. At least he didn't see me that night...

You take another glance at the crumpled piece of paper. Removing it from the board, you start typing into your phone.

Call him? Text him?

Call him.

No.

Text him.

You sighed. It was almost 11pm. Honestly, he probably won't even answer at this point.

You sit down on the edge of your bed staring at the number in your phone. The message box empty.

You don't want to wake him, so a message is fine. He'll answer in the morning. It's fine.

You type hi and throw your phone into your mess of blankets. Falling back onto your bed, you stare at the ceiling before realizing you never said your name. I mean, he would know right? He doesn't go around giving out his number to multiple girls ... right?

You reach over for your phone, and it starts buzzing.

Incoming call .. Semi.


	4. 04

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝔀𝓲𝓭𝓮 𝓮𝔂𝓮𝓼 - 𝓵𝓸𝓬𝓪𝓵 𝓷𝓪𝓽𝓲𝓿𝓮𝓼

"Hello?"

She had let the phone ring a little too long. I didn't think she was going to pick up even though she had just texted me. 

"Hi," I smiled through the phone, "what are you doing still up?"

"I could ask you the same thing," she stated, very matter of fact.

There was a pause, but before I could speak, she gave me an answer.

"I was thinking about ..." she started to trail off into a mumble.

"You were thinking about ..." I wanted her to finish her sentence. I could feel frustration build because I was hopeful. But for what? That she was thinking about me?

"Just about what to write," she said quietly, another long pause before she spoke again.

"I haven't been able to write anything for a while. I can't force it, but I hate not being able to write anything. You know?"

I laid in bed, listening to her. Is that what she was doing earlier? If so, did I bother her? I shut my eyes and rubbed my forehead. Idiot. Idiot. Idiot...

"You still there?" She whispered, as if she was trying to be careful as to how loud she spoke, not like before when she did it out of uneasiness.

"Yeah.." I breathed, "Yeah, sorry. Why do you feel the need to though?"

She was quiet again.

Suddenly, she changed the subject, "why did you end up calling me?"

It was obvious she wasn't going to answer my question. I wasn't going to push it right now.

"I wanted to talk to you." I wanted to hear your voice.

She sighed, "well I'm sorry this isn't the best conversation," and let out a small laugh, almost like another sigh.

"I don't mind," I said before I asked her what I wanted to earlier, "would you possibly want to meet up tomorrow.. for coffee maybe?"

It was quiet again. And I heard her hum a little on the other end. She was cute, in an endearing kind of way. 

"You're not going to run away from me again, are you?" She said shyly. You could tell by her tone, she was trying to make a joke.

"Low blow," I groaned, "I promise. I want-" I paused for a second before finishing, "to see you."

I don't know why it felt different. Why I wanted to know more about her. She didn't say much, but I saw what she wrote. Those pages with her lyrics. She could seriously write, and she spilled every ounce of herself into her songs. And her voice. Despite how quiet she might have been, it's what drew me to her in the first place. It all seemed familiar.


	5. 05

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // (𝓲𝓯 𝔂𝓸𝓾'𝓻𝓮 𝔀𝓸𝓷𝓭𝓮𝓻𝓲𝓷𝓰 𝓲𝓯 𝓘 𝔀𝓪𝓷𝓽 𝔂𝓸𝓾) 𝓘 𝔀𝓪𝓷𝓽 𝔂𝓸𝓾 - 𝔀𝓮𝓮𝔃𝓮𝓻 

The sky was gray, and there was a slight chill.

Semi had texted you after the phone call where to meet. You woke up a little too early for your liking, mostly because you knew choosing something to wear would be the hardest part of your morning.

You settled on an oversized maroon sweater with leggings, your black booties, a beanie and a scarf. It was the end of November, and it was starting to get colder.

You walked towards the cafe and soon spotted Semi. He wore black jeans, boots, and a dark purple sweater with a vest. His hair was messy as usual, but you liked it.

You liked it.

What am I doing? You thought. You barely knew Semi. You didn't even know if you could consider this a date. As far as you knew, you could consider you guys friends, acquaintances even. It's nothing to get excited over, you had to remind yourself. But you knew convincing yourself of that was easier said than done. You wanted this to be a date.

He smiled at you and opened the door.

"Right this way," he said, allowing you to go first.

You walked up to the counter, him following suit. You could feel him behind you, almost against you. He leaned forward, his face inches away from yours.

"What do you want?" He asked, giving a small smile.

"It's fine, I can order for myself," you felt yourself blush, the blood quickly rushing to your cheeks. He was so close, that if you turned your head slightly, you could almost brush your lips against his...

The burning sensation in your cheeks became hotter at the thought. Why did he keep making you feel this way. You felt as though your face was always red whenever you were around him, and it was kind of embarrassing - which in turn, just keeps making your face red. It feels like a never ending circle of embarrassment for you.

"Really it's fine, let me." He placed his order and looked at you, asking with his eyes to say what you want.

After placing your order, you took a seat in a corner booth, away from most people who were already there. Both hands were gripped around your cup. You could feel the heat from your tea through the ceramic. It felt better on your hands than on your face. But that feeling hadn't gone away yet either. You could feel him staring at you, while you stared into your drink.

"I'm actually pretty shocked you agreed to meet so early considering you were up so late last night," Semi started.

You peeked up, slowly bringing your tea to lips. You took a small sip before answering.

"You were up with me."

"You're not wrong," he took a sip of his coffee, "so I was thinking if you're not -"

Semi was suddenly cut off by someone who stopped next to your table. She was clearly upset with him. Her arms were crossed, her eyes shooting daggers into him. You kept your head down, slowly taking sips of tea.

"You blew me off yesterday, and now you're here with someone else. I knew I'd find you here, but I didn't think you'd have company."

She shot a quick glance at you before directing her gaze back at Semi.

"This has nothing to do with her. I told you, I'd meet up with you a different day," he looked over at you as he said, "something came up yesterday."

You felt yourself almost choke on your tea.

For one, you did not want to come between anyone. However, you weren't expecting to be the actual reason Semi didn't meet up with her.

The girl didn't look satisfied. But she didn't argue with him.

"Fine. I'll see you later tonight," she looked pleased with herself, smirking at you before walking off.

You personally didn't care, you assumed she was trying to upset you. As much as you wished this was a date, it was clear, it was just as friends. He was supposed to meet someone yesterday anyways ...

"Ignore her," he said, his hand reached out and touched yours that was still wrapped around your cup.

"It's fine. I really don't care," you said with a smirk, almost laughing. Your eyes slowly looked up from your drink and you saw him smirking as well.

His eyes. Those brown eyes were staring into yours. You didn't drop your gaze this time. He slowly licked his lips, before they curled into a into a smile.

"So ... what are you doing tonight?"


	6. 06

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓲𝓷𝓯𝓲𝓷𝓲𝓽𝓮 𝓱𝓲𝓰𝓱 - 𝓹𝓪𝓷𝓪𝓶𝓪 𝔀𝓮𝓭𝓭𝓲𝓷𝓰

"Tonight?"

Her chin rested on her palm, she looked down, thinking of her answer. She traced the rim of her cup with her finger a few times. 

"I'm not doing anything," y/n shrugged, taking another sip of tea before saying, "I don't know why you're asking though, aren't you busy?"

I know she was referring to the girl from earlier, Aoi. I don't blame her. It was an awkward situation for her, I'm sure, considering Aoi came out of no where and tried to make y/n jealous. I was trapped in a corner. On one hand, I had every intention of meeting Aoi later tonight to make up for yesterday, but on the other hand, I'd much rather be with ...

"Oh Aoi? I agreed to meet her yesterday for coffee, but it's nothing like that. So I don't have to -"

"So this is where you take all your friends?" She had a slight smile as she took another sip of tea. Y/n knew what she was doing. She was shy, but she wasn't naive. 

There is just something about her.

"You could say that, but that's not the case right now."

I saw a red flush wash over her face.

I was beginning to like how flustered y/n got so easily. I felt as though I could say anything and she would start to unravel. It was cute.

"I want you to come to one of my shows tonight. We could hang out after the show. I think it would be fun." I reached out my hand to touch hers again. She wasn't reciprocating ... again. Her hands stayed on her cup, even though she didn't have anything left to drink.

"Maybe I can stop by," she said quietly. Her eyes weren't meeting mine. They stared into her empty cup, probably wishing she had something to distract herself from turning red again. Her face was adorable when her cheeks were flushed.

"Well I want you there," I paused, "you don't have to if you don't want to, but I want you there."

I meant it, too. I wanted to keep spending my time with her. I wanted to see where it could go with y/n. Even though she seemed to keep to herself, I could tell she was independent, like she didn't need anyone else, and she was fine with that. I was used to girls clinging onto me, acting like they needed me. With y/n, I could feel myself wanting to need her.

She smiled and slowly started to let go of her cup. The opportunity came, and I took it. My fingers started to intertwine with hers. Hers almost lingering before holding mine.

Y/n leaned her cheek against her other hand. Her hair draped to one side, her lips slowly forming another smile.

"We'll see."


	7. 07

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tw // referring to mentally abusive relationship.

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓳𝓾𝓵𝔂 - 𝓷𝓸𝓪𝓱 𝓬𝔂𝓻𝓾𝓼 

You couldn't wait to get home.

Not that anything felt wrong. If anything, it all felt right. Just right enough, that you needed to write everything down.

The words flowed out onto paper easily. It was what you've been hoping for days now. You knew your best ideas for songs came to you when you were at your happiest.

You grabbed your guitar and started to strum each cord, letting the music fill your room. Breathing in each note, totally consuming yourself in the sound.

Why did it take meeting Semi, to bring you back to how you used to be?

You sighed at the thought, leaning against your guitar. It's not him. You just haven't been around another person since ...

Your mind quickly spiraled. You could feel yourself focusing onto nothing. The expression on your face stayed blank, staring out your window. The sky had become a darker gray, gloom setting in around you. It didn't help your mood.

You mindlessly played at the strings of your guitar. You weren't trying to play anything. You were just trying to distract yourself from thoughts creeping in from your past. It didn't work though. You blinked a couple of times, trying to get yourself out of the trance you managed to consume yourself with.

Stop thinking about him.

The him you're referring to wasn't Semi this time.

It was your previous relationship.

At first, he seemed to enjoy listening to you sing around your apartment you shared together. Still, he would cut you off by kissing you - an act you thought meant he liked what he heard - that is, until he would tell you to be a little quieter. When you would go to perform at open mics, he never showed. He give you the excuse that he was too busy with work. Then he'd always finish the conversation by telling you he'd much rather you spend your free time with him anyways, because then maybe he'd consider taking some time out of work. It seemed harmless at first. Until he started to become angry at the thought of you still trying pursuing your music, even after he after he told you it was nothing more than a hobby - hurting you by saying you weren't really that good to begin with.

You never understood why it bothered him so much. It never affected him in any way. So why couldn't you enjoy this on your own? He had plenty of hobbies, you really only had your music.

Eventually, you realized it was because you focused more on your music than him. He became jealous of something else you loved, despite how happy it made you.

You soon put it all away, hoping it was just a bump in your relationship. Maybe you could work through it, and show him that you loved him and music all the same. That music didn't totally come before him. Despite the fact that you wanted it to ...

You tried distancing yourself from him. You don't exactly remember what led to the break up. Your friends helped you move out of your shared apartment and into the spot you have now. He never tried reaching out though. You felt as though, your relationship had already ended, but neither of you were willing to talk about it.

If it wasn't for Semi though ...

You had to remind yourself again. You barely knew Semi. And he barely knew you. As much as you hoped something would come of this, what if there are things he ends up hating about you too.

You would have to open up again. Show someone this side of you. The side where you question every feeling they have towards you. The ugly parts of you. You're quiet, but you're an open book. You're emotional, no matter how hard you try to hide it. It's even more obvious through your music. If he ever hears you play, he'll know. You don't want to open yourself up again like you did before. You don't want to hurt again like before.

You lie in bed and close your eyes, trying to push the bad thoughts away. You're happy when he's around. He appreciates your music. Don't think like that.

You reach behind you for your headphones, and glance over at your phone. There was a message.

Semi  
I want to see you tonight.

It's only 5pm ... I still have a few hours before the show.

You close your eyes, listening to your music to try and calm yourself.


	8. 08

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓼𝓽𝓸𝓷𝓮𝓬𝓸𝓵𝓭 - 𝓶𝓪𝓬𝓱𝓲𝓷𝓮𝓱𝓮𝓪𝓻𝓽

The sound was deafening. But I was alive.

I could feel it throughout my body as I played. The sounds. The pulse. The atmosphere. It took control. This high, I couldn't let it go.

It was in this moment, I was in my element.

At the final note, I scanned the crowd as our singer announced our last song of the night. It was crowded, but I didn't see her.

Where was she?

I didn't expect her to show up, but my hopes were high. I thought that maybe she'd want to see me just as I badly as I wanted to see her.

After the last song, I walked off stage and started to put away our equipment.

"Come on, Semi, we can do that later, let's have a drink," Kaji said, wrapping his arm around my shoulders.

Kaji was our lead singer. He was usually optimistic and made rash decisions, without thinking of any consequences. Kaji was the one who booked most of our gigs, since we didn't have a manger yet, and had a tendency to spring them on us - typically the day of.

I tried shrugging him off.

"Yeah, one sec," I closed the case to my guitar and stood there for a few seconds.

"Hey." A voice came from behind me.

My heart stopped for a second before I turned around. Aoi stood there, arms behind her back, acting innocent even though her smile was almost sinister.

"Hey." I repeated back. I let out a heavy sigh.

"Nice show tonight, you looked really good," she started to walk towards me, eventually touching my chest. Normally that this point, my arms would be around her waist, and we would tease each other, eventually deciding to leave together.

But my arms stayed by my side. I leered down at her, unamused.

"Not tonight."

Her face scowled. She instinctively rolled her eyes. Her jaw shifted in annoyance.

"It's that girl, isn't it?" She asked even though she knew the answer.

I didn't respond. I eventually turned away from her before grabbing my guitar case. I had only taken a couple of steps before Aoi spoke up, expressing how she felt about the situation.

"She obviously didn't show up tonight, and I did. I'm not sure what you see, but you're making a mistake walking away from someone you at least know likes you."

"Don't act like you know how y/n feels about me," I was pissed. I couldn't help the fact that I shot her irritated look.

But I could hear the pain in her voice. I knew Aoi meant that she liked me. She's told me before, but I kept pushing it off. I closed my eyes, and sighed.

"I can't return your feelings, Aoi. Not right now," I tried to be as honest as I could. I couldn't deny that I felt something for Aoi, but I knew the connection I felt with y/n was different.

As I started to turn away from Aoi, I felt a pull on my wrist. Aoi held onto me.

"Please don't chose her." Her eyes glistened. She wanted to cry, but she didn't want to show me that side of her.

I felt guilty. I barely knew y/n, and I know Aoi. But the choice between them was obvious for me.

I pulled her in for a hug and held her there. I instinctively had my hand holding the back of her head close to my chest, and I kissed the top of her forehead.

Before I could apologize to Aoi, there was a small sound behind me. I almost missed it because of the loud music playing through out the bar.

"Semi?"


	9. 09

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> tw // angst

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓹𝓪𝔀𝓷𝓮𝓻 - 𝓹𝓸𝓵𝓪𝓻 𝓫𝓮𝓪𝓻 𝓬𝓵𝓾𝓫

You don't know what you expected.

It's only been a little over a day. Why did you feel this way? It hurt. It hurt seeing them together. The jealousy you felt, even though you barely knew him.

He told you it was nothing.

Not even a few hours ago, you were the happiest you've been in a while. You were in the place you've been trying to get to with your music. You wanted to share that with him.

But maybe you got ahead of yourself. 

It's nothing.

You overslept. You tried making it on time to see him perform. You were just a little too late. As you walked into the bar, you scanned the room, only to see the last of members making their way behind stage. You maneuvered your way through the crowd, trying to find a way through to the back. That's when you saw them. If it was nothing, why was he holding her. And why did he kiss her.

You didn't let him give you much of an explanation before leaving the bar. You felt the tears start to form. You felt stupid.

"Y/n!"

You hurried through a couple of small crowds before turning down an alleyway. You finally turned around to see Semi standing there, only a couple steps away from you. You could see he was concerned about you. He was hesitant in his movements, and held out his hands as if he was reaching for you.

"It really is nothing," he reaffirmed what you have been trying to tell yourself this whole time, almost pleading.

You tried to wipe away the tears forming, before they started to fall. It was embarrassing enough to feel the way you did, but it was more embarrassing that you were actually starting to cry. You felt as though you had no right to. Semi wasn't yours.

"It's fine. It really is," you breathed, trying to calm yourself, "we're friends, just friends, I know."

Semi stared at you with a blank expression, taking slow steps in your direction. His face started to scowl as he got closer, noticing your eyes were bloodshot from holding back your tears.

"That's not what I want," he said seriously. He tried wiping away one of your tears. 

You swallowed, trying to catch your breath. You were trying not to hiccup on your words.

It's not what you want either.

"I don't like who I am right now," you choked out, "this isn't me. I shouldn't be acting like this."

It was silent.

Semi reached out, tentatively. He slowly started to pull you closer to him. You let it happen. He wrapped his arms around your waist, resting his chin on the top of your head. Your face was pressed against his chest, tears escaping every now and again, staining his shirt. You felt yourself melting into him. You enfolded your arms around him, which caused him to tighten his grip on you. You didn't want to let go. 

"Y/n," Semi spoke softly, "we can stay really good friends, if that's what you want."

You still hadn't let go.

You knew that he didn't mean it. You could hear it in his voice, he was hurt. You started to let go.

"No, stay," he demanded, but his last word was almost too soft to hear, "please."

You didn't move.

You wanted Semi. There wasn't any doubt about that. You just didn't know what was holding you back. Everything felt like it was falling into place, but then why are you suddenly pushing him away?

A tinged of guilt ran through your body. It was doubt. Doubt is what was holding you back. You couldn't imagine how a relationship with Semi could last. There was no way he would come to love everything about you. He might've been interested in your lyrics, but it would fade. The doubt kept creeping into your mind.

You tried backing away again, and this time, Semi let you.

"Can we?" You started, "can we at least try being friends?"

There was a pain in your chest. What are you saying?

His mouth didn't move to answer you. He stared at you longingly, guiding his hand up to your hair, tucking a piece behind your ear. He kept his hand on your neck, while rubbing his thumb against your cheek. His expression changed. It was almost as though he had given up.

"If that's what you want."

The pain lingered a little longer.


	10. 10

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓼𝓵𝓸𝔀 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓪𝓭𝔂 - 𝓸𝓯 𝓶𝓸𝓷𝓼𝓽𝓮𝓻𝓼 𝓪𝓷𝓭 𝓶𝓮𝓷

I didn't mean it.

Of course, I didn't want to be just friends. I wanted more than that. 

I walked her home. Y/n had apologized a few times for being late and for her reaction to Aoi and I.

"You don't have to keep apologizing, you're not in the wrong here" I said, keeping my eyes on the path in front of me. I hated that she was blaming herself, like it was her fault that we were in this situation.

She fell silent.

I was aggravated. I didn't even get a chance. Part of me blamed Aoi for being there tonight. If she had just left me alone, this walk home with y/n would be different. But the other part of me, blamed myself. I should've been straight forward with Aoi in the beginning. I shouldn't have led her on; I should've told her that I didn't see anything happening between us. Then maybe, I would've been alone when y/n found me tonight.

I should've done a lot of things differently.

But I was grateful, in a way. Y/n wanted to have me around. Even if it was just friends, I could still see her, and maybe everything would eventually work out in my favor. That is, if she wanted that too.

"This is me," she said, turning to face me. Her eyes were a little glassy, red underneath from rubbing away tears. I hated seeing her like this. She avoided looking at me the entire walk home, but every time she made any movement, I knew it was because she was trying to hide the fact that she was crying from me.

I wanted to pull her aside and hug her. I wanted to make her feel better. I wanted to keep telling her that what she saw meant nothing, until it was fully engrained into her mind.

"Can I call you tomorrow?" I asked, hopeful. Even if she just wanted to be friends, I still wanted to make an effort to talk to her, and see her.

"I think I need a couple of days to myself," she said quietly, "thank you for walking me home though." She kept her eyes on the ground in front of her, as her chin trembled on the last few words. I felt my face twinge. I hated this feeling. She wasn't letting me get close to comfort her, and I started to feel helpless as I watched her stand there on the verge of crying again. 

Maybe there was something else holding her back from me. Maybe it wasn't just seeing me with Aoi that made her feel this way.

"Y/n ... come on," I reached out and held onto her wrist, before she turned up the pathway to her front step.

"Semi," she took a small pause, while placing her hand on top of mine and slowly removing it from her wrist, "I want to see you. I just need some time to think that's all."

She wanted to see me. It was a selfish thought, but I needed to hear it.

I felt a sense of relief. I nodded and backed away. I didn't want to push her away. I wanted things to work out between us, even if it meant I had to wait longer than I expected.

She stood there, wanting to say more. I could tell something was eating at her as she rubbed her arm.

That's when y/n reached out for my hand. She lightly brushed the top of it with her thumb, all while looking down at our hands touching. She started to intertwine her fingers with mine, reminding me of this morning.

"I like you Semi," she finally said, still avoiding eye contact, "it's just too soon for me, I don't want to ruin this."

She let go and turned away before I could even say a word.


	11. 11

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓱𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓱𝓮𝓻 - 𝓬𝓸𝓷𝓪𝓷 𝓰𝓻𝓪𝔂

It had been a little over a week since you last saw Semi.

It's not that you didn't want to talk to him. Instead, you consumed yourself with work and school, and had managed to write a couple of songs whenever you made free time. It was just taking a little longer than you needed to think things through.

You needed to move on from your past relationship. And you owed Semi an explanation. You were sure there were some questions, considering you walked off before you he could respond to you that night. Then again, he hasn't tried to reach out to you.

Maybe he actually doesn't care ...

You tossed around in bed, irritated. For some reason, you couldn't stay still. You didn't feel like going to classes today, and you didn't have work. You had the whole day to yourself, and you planned on doing absolutely nothing. However, your mind wouldn't let you. You needed to move. You needed to do something.

You rolled out of bed and threw on your boots and beanie, along with a jacket and a large scarf. You stepped outside to see the streets dusted with snow. This time of year was your favorite when it was lightly snowing.

The cold air hit your face. Feeling it nearly calmed you down. The chill you felt was better than nothing. You slid your boots through the snow, making your way up the hill that led towards the university. This wasn't the direction you intended on going. You stopped in your tracks, and turned down a side street. You walked aimlessly, but in the back of your mind you had an idea where you were going.

Semi.

You smiled at the thought of him, burying your face in your scarf. You felt you knew what to say. You knew he could help you move on. Not in a way you would be using him, but in a way that he could help you be the person you wanted to be. You felt as though Semi could bring out the best in you if you just let him into your life. You wanted that, and you felt as though he would want to be a part of your life as well.

Semi.

You were only a block away, but you could see the awning with fairy lights dangling off it. It was the coffee shop you met Semi at only an week earlier. A small part of you was hoping to see him there.

You trekked towards the cafe, heart pounding. What will you do if he's there? He hasn't heard from you. How would you even start a conversation? In the back of your mind, you're thinking he's probably over dealing with you.

You open the door, the bell dinging as you step through. Your eyes quickly scan the room. There was no sign of him. You take a deep breath, and go place your order at the counter. 

It was somewhat of a relief that Semi wasn't there. You were winging it, and probably would have been too uneasy to face him. He probably wouldn't have paid any mind to you anyways. 

As you grab your drink, the bell rings again. You turn your head in hopes to see him, but you are disappointed when you see Aoi, who stops in her tracks seeing you. She looks like your typical mean girl. Long black hair, perfect body, and flawless skin. Her piercing blue eyes are like daggers. It almost amazes you that he would consider choosing you over her.

You try to shake the thought as you notice her death stare. She doesn't seem to move out of the way as she removes her gloves.

You put your head down and try to make your way past her. It shocks you, but she places her hand on your arm, stopping you. Aoi doesn't look at you though, and you can't bring yourself to look at her either.

"You need to talk to him," she says before proceeding towards the counter. She sounded exasperated, like she had given up on trying to talk to Semi herself. 

You rush out the door, feeling the cold air on your face again. It was a sign, it was now or never.

Semi.


	12. 12

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓭𝓸𝔀𝓷𝓽𝓸𝔀𝓷 - 𝓶𝓪𝓳𝓲𝓬𝓪𝓵 𝓬𝓵𝓸𝓾𝓭𝔃

The light from my phone lit up the room.

It has been eating at me. What do I do? Should I call her at this point? Or should I just show up at her apartment?

No. God no. That's probably the worst and most stalker-ish thing you could do. You grab your sheets in your fists out of aggravation. The light from my phone sets a blue tone on my wall again.

I reached behind to grab my phone, fumbling a little to set the screen straight. My body instinctively sat up.

Y/n  
Meet me on campus, where we met.

I rushed out of bed, and quickly get dressed, sprinting out the door.

I inhaled the cold air, my entire body felt stiff. I've barely left my apartment, except for band practice. I haven't been able to get that night out of my head.

I start running down the streets, trying not to lose my balance on the slick snow. I needed to get there as soon as I could though. My feet felt weighted, as though I was in a dream where I try to run, but I can't seem to move as fast as I want to.

I had been waiting for y/n to reach out. The amount of times I had her contact up in my phone, ready to call her. Constantly writing messages, but never sending them. I didn't want to force her to talk to me.

That night, the sound of her voice was sad. I could tell that something was wrong. I was at a loss as to what to do, or what to say to her.

When I finally made it to campus, I stopped short. She was there in front of me, standing under the tree I first found her. Her back was turned, her long (h/c) fell down her back. The snow was decorating her hair, almost making it glitter.

As I stepped closer, she peered over her shoulder before bringing her entire body around to face me. I noticed that she was holding a cup from the cafe we went to.

She was there?

She smiled at me, meeting me half way.

"Hi," y/n whispered with a smile.

"Hi," I responded back.

"I'm sorry I haven't —"

I cut her off. "Don't be."

I didn't want her to apologize. I didn't care that she didn't try to talk to me. She was here now.

I stepped towards her. I went to place my hand on her cheek. It was cold from waiting outside. I started to rub my thumb against her rose-colored cheeks. I stared into her (e/c) eyes. Her long eyelashes catching snowflakes.

"I ran into Aoi actually, down at that cafe," she looked to the side, almost forcing herself to smile now, "she told me to talk to you."

My heart sank. She was only reaching out because Aoi told her to? The expression on my face must have been apparent, because she suddenly gasped.

"Wait — I didn't mean it like that," she shook her free hand out in front of her, her eyes wide, "I wanted to talk to you ... but the way she told me, I knew I had to do it now."

As we started to down the walkways on campus, she explained what had been going on with her. How she had been in a previous relationship, and how he treated her. How she lost her interest in music through out the past year, mostly because she tried to make her relationship work rather than make herself happy.

It's how she ended everything she was saying though, that took me by surprise.

"It wasn't until I met you that day, until we talked, and until we went out for coffee, I started to feel a weight lift off my shoulders."

At this point, her demeanor had changed. Y/n was lively. Using her body to explain her happiness. Talking with her hands, her voice delighted at the thought of what she was telling me. I loved seeing this side of her.

She's beautiful.

"If it wasn't because of you, Semi, I wouldn't have started writing again." Our hands met as we walked next to each other. Her fingers teased mine, gradually taking hold.


	13. 13

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓪𝓻𝓮 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓫𝓸𝓻𝓮𝓭 𝔂𝓮𝓽 - 𝔀𝓪𝓵𝓵𝓸𝔀𝓼 + 𝓬𝓵𝓪𝓲𝓻𝓸

Semi followed you into your apartment.

After leaving your shoes by the door, you led him to your bedroom.

You felt like a weight had been lifted off your shoulders after you explained everything to him. By telling him about the past year, and your past relationship, you felt as though you closed the door to that part of your life. Like you could finally start over.

Semi took a seat at the edge of your bed. He looked anxious, almost like he was uncomfortable to be in a girls' room. It was kind of funny to you considering he didn't come off as that type of guy.

"You can get comfortable," you said with a smile, before turning away.

You had countless notebooks and loose pages scattered all over your desk. You shuffled through some papers and notebooks, before finding what you were looking for. There was one note written at the top that you could read clearly. It said, for Semi. You had traced over each letter numerous times, that the ink bled through to another page. You thought about how you would daze off thinking about Semi as you wrote this.

"I have something I want to show you," you said, before reaching for your guitar. You adjusted yourself on the bed, and tuned a couple of strings. You focused while you began strumming a couple of notes.

"Keep in mind, it's not finished yet, but I wanted you to hear this." You took a deep breath, and closed your eyes. You could feel your face start to burn, but you wanted to do this for him. In a way, this song was part of your apology.

As you began to play, your body started to relax. You felt each note you played. Eventually, you opened your eyes slightly, and glanced over at Semi.

Semi had his back against the wall. He sat with one of his knees bent so he could lean his arm against it. His head laid on top of his arm, facing the opposite wall. You couldn't see his expression. You felt a sense of relief. He probably recognized how nervous you were to perform for him.

Your voice trailed off at the end, while playing the last few notes. You heart was racing. Your mind was running through a million different thoughts, wondering if he even like the song.

He turned to face you, still keeping his head resting on his arm.

"Thank you," Semi said with a smile.

That's it? That didn't really answer what you were wondering. You weren't expecting him to be thrilled by the song, or even looking for any kind of applause, but you wanted him to say more. It took so much of you to put yourself out there and sing for him.

You carefully leaned your guitar against the wall next to her bed. You then situated yourself on the bed to be more comfortable. Resting your body against the wall next to Semi, crossing your ankles.

"Y/n," Semi said softly. You looked over at him. He reached over and caressed your face with his hand. His thumb brushed your cheekbone. Your heart was pounding out of your chest. You knew what was coming next. You felt tense. Slowly, he brought his face closer to yours.

Your eyes closed and the features of your face softened. He gently pressed his lips against yours, as his hand shifted, entangling his fingers in your smooth locks of hair. Your body began to relax. This is what you've been wanting for a long time.

As he went to deepen the kiss, you backed away. You ran your thumb along your bottom lip, surprised. As much as you wanted to keep kissing Semi, you needed to take a breath.

"What's wrong?" He sighed, tracing his finger along your jawline.

You shook your head, and buried your face in your palms. You started to laugh.

"I'm just happy," you finally said.

A rush of adrenaline hit you and you cupped his face in your hands. You surprised yourself, and kissed him.

"Semi," you breathed, "you made me happy."


	14. 14

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓫𝓵𝓸𝓸𝓶 - 𝓹𝓪𝓹𝓮𝓻 𝓴𝓲𝓽𝓮𝓼

Her voice.

Every word she sang, poured out emotion. And it hit me, I've heard her before.

I remembered almost a year ago, hearing the same girl at one of the open mics. Our band was performing that night and had shown up early to begin set up. Some artists came and played a couple songs before bands usually headlined later in the night. I caught myself staring from backstage, vaguely hearing Kaji getting frustrated behind me because I stopped helping. I never saw her face though. The moment she left the stage, she left the bar in a hurry. Only stopping for moment to quickly talk to the owner before running out the door.

After hearing what y/n told me earlier, do I understand why she left straight away.

"You should really perform again," I said, coiling a lock of her hair around my finger. Her head was resting against my lap.

"Again?" She jerked her head back, with a confused looked on her face. I forgot that I hadn't shared my memory of her yet. 

I let out a quick laugh, and ran my fingers through my hair, "Yeah, I mean — I've heard you in person before."

I wasn't sure how to tell her any other way. I told her about the time I saw her perform, but never got the chance of meeting her.

Y/n sat up and twisted her body towards you. Her brows furrowed with a confused look on her face.

"You're serious," she acted as though I was lying to her. By the look on my face, she could tell I was serious, "I don't think I could." She began to shake her head and get off the bed. Y/n then started to organize her notebooks and song lyrics as a way to distract herself from what I said.

I pushed myself off the bed and came up behind her. I wrapped my arms around her waist and buried my face into her neck, gently placing a kiss.

"What if I played for you? You sing, and I play." I turned her around to face me. Her hands her clasped together in front of her mouth, while she avoided eye contact. I followed her gaze until she looked at me.

"There's an open mic right before Christmas, we could do this together. You won't be alone." I tried convincing her.

She then turned away from me, and started to shuffle through her work. She ripped a piece of paper out of her notebook. Y/n quickly read through it, biting on her thumbnail out of concentration. I sat down on the edge of the bed, waiting to see what her answer would be.

Y/n then shoved the piece of paper towards me. It was another one of her songs. I glanced it over.

"I'll do it," she said hesitantly, "but you're serious about doing this with me?"

I nodded. I wanted to do this for her. I could tell how much she enjoyed herself when she sang, despite how nervous she might have been.

She took a deep breath, and sat down next to me and placed her head against my shoulder.

"Thank you," she whispered.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> author's note // not my favorite and it's a little short, but i might add to this later. hopefully the next one is better! :)


	15. 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> cw // sexual themes (sexy fluff? idk)

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓭𝓪𝓭𝓭𝔂 𝓲𝓼𝓼𝓾𝓮𝓼 - 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓷𝓮𝓲𝓰𝓱𝓫𝓸𝓻𝓱𝓸𝓸𝓭

Why did you agree to this?

You're entire body felt like it was shaking. You could feel your breathing start to speed up as you looked out at the crowd from behind the stage. Why does it feel like there's more people here tonight than any other night?!

Suddenly, you felt Semi's arms come from behind you and wrap around your waist, swaying you.

"You'll do just fine," he whispered in your ear, "just remember, I'm going to be right next to you."

Semi gave you a sense of comfort. You felt at ease with Semi around you. Your breathing became calmer, and the tension slowly released from your body. You were somewhat amazed at the effect Semi had over you.

Then, it was time for you and Semi to go on stage. He nudged you forward, guiding you over to the stools that were placed in the middle of the stage. It seemed eerily quiet for a bar. Or maybe it was just your mind playing tricks on you.

As you took your seats, you watched him as he set up. He was calm, but you knew that this is what he was used to. This was a piece of cake for him. You peered out into the dark, crowded room, and then back at Semi. He was smiling at you, ready to start playing.

"You ready?"

\- - - -

As you made your way back to your apartment, hand in hand with Semi, you could tell something was bothering him. He was fidgeting with something inside his pocket, and had barely said a word to you since you left the bar. You glanced up at him with a smile, hoping he would reciprocate, but he didn't notice. 

"Is everything you okay?" you finally asked.

His head quickly looked in your direction. You were finally outside of your apartment, but he stopped before making his way inside.

"I have something for you," Semi said as he reached into this pocket. He pulled out a small brown box. He placed it in the palm of your hand. As you removed the cover, you saw lying on a soft cotton pillow, was a silver necklace that had a simple pink jeweled heart.

You removed it from the box and dangled it on your fingertips.

"It's beautiful, Semi," you said, surprised, "You really didn't have to get me anything, though."

"I wanted to," he said, taking the necklace and unclasping it to put around your neck. You touched it against your chest. 

Your arms wrapped around his neck, "Thank you."

He placed a kiss on your forehead before you both made your way into the apartment.

You made your way through your apartment towards the kitchen, not noticing Semi was following right behind you. You grabbed a glass out of the cabinet.

"You want something to drink?" You said as you ran the sink water to fill your glass. When you turned around, Semi had placed his arms on either side of you, leaning against the kitchen counter. You carefully set down your glass next to the both of you. 

His was face inches away from you. You could feel your breathing heighten at the tension. Your eyes kept glancing down at his lips.

"Can you do something for me?" Semi asked alluringly.

You looked up into his brown eyes, "Anything."

"I want you to call me by my first same." He gazed down at you, his eyes darkened. Something about the way he stood over you, attracted you. He started to straighten his body as he moved closer to you, almost pressing against you.

"Eita," you whispered, as he started to place his hands on your body. One hand reached behind your head, getting entangled in your hair. The other started to feel at your waist, and guiding it's way under your shirt. You wanted to keep feeling his touch on your smooth skin.

"Again," he demanded. You felt yourself come undone at his command. You liked it.

"Eita," you repeated, almost gasping. He had already began removing your shirt, while kissing down your neck. You felt a soft whimper leave your lips when his teeth grazed against your collarbone, as if he was smiling at the noise you just made. You felt him press against you, while a pressure built in your core. You were suddenly needing him. 

Your hands explored their way into his messy hair, tugging it slightly. He moaned into your mouth as he began kissing you again. You were intoxicated by him as your tongues explored each other's mouths.

His hands started to get lost in your hair, bringing your forehead to his. His breathing had become sporadic and heavy. 

"Y/n, I want you." You wanted him too. You didn't need to give him an answer though. Your clothes were already scattered over the floor, and there was no stopping either you from taking this any further. 

You were already tracing your hands against his body, as he picked you up by your thighs and carried you over to the bed. 

You were lost in the euphoria of the moment. This high, you couldn't let go.

"Eita."

\- - - -

It happened. 

You laid on your side with your body against Eita, tangled up in a sheet, while lightly playing with your necklace. He had his arm underneath you, gently stroking your arm. 

As you laid there, you could feel the vibrations from his phone on the ground below you. He turned over, reaching down to grab it.

"You're kidding." He whispered.


	16. 16

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝔀𝓱𝓮𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓹𝓪𝓻𝓽𝔂'𝓼 𝓸𝓿𝓮𝓻 - 𝓫𝓲𝓵𝓵𝓲𝓮 𝓮𝓲𝓵𝓲𝓼𝓱

"A year."

Y/n was wrapped in her sheet, hugging her knees close to her chest. Her head rested on them, and she avoided eye contact like she usually did when she was uncomfortable. But I could tell this time, she was upset.

"So you slept with me, and are just going to leave." Her voice broke at the end.

"Of course not!" I was shocked she would even think of me doing something so low, "I would never intentionally do that to you."

She fell to her side, and faced the wall. The sheet hugged her curves, and her smooth legs were crossed and pulled up to her stomach. I climbed into the bed next to her, aligning my body with hers. I draped my arm over her stomach and pulled her close. 

"A year," she whispered to herself. 

I kissed her shoulder.

"It'll go by quickly, I promise," I tried to reassure her that everything would be okay, "I'll talk to you every day, we can work this out - it's just a little bump."

Y/n turned over, still managing to stay against me. She started to place light kisses on my jawline, before placing on my lips. 

"I know," she let you a small sigh, "I just wish it wasn't so soon ... or for this long."

I knew how she felt. This was typical Kaji, jumping at a chance for a gig despite the consequences or inconveniences it might cause. I wasn't ungrateful for this opportunity though. If anything, I was just disappointed that as soon as I had y/n, I had to leave her behind. I knew she wouldn't be able to come along. Y/n still had to finish school, and she had a job here. I wasn't going to uproot her out of my own selfishness.

But that didn't mean I wouldn't suggest it ...

"You could always come with me," I said hopefully. I knew the answer as I placed a kiss on her forehead.

"You know I can't do that," she said as she placed her head against my chest.

It was silent. There wasn't much more to say. She knew how much this opportunity meant for me, and I knew she would have to wait for me to come back - if she chose to. 

At least I hope she waits. The thought lingered in the back on my mind. 

My finger coiled around her hair. I could smell the lavender scent of her shampoo. I didn't want to forget the smell, or this moment lying with her.

The thought wasn't going away. The urge to ask her kept growing.

"You know you don't have to wait for me, y/n," I said breaking the silence. I was a glutton for punishment. I need the reassurance. I needed to hear that she'd wait. Still, what if she thinks we should just stay really good friends again. I couldn't stand the thought of that happening again. I didn't want to keep losing chances with her.

I started to feel her finger tips trace up my side, before she rested her hand on my chest.

"You know I don't want that, especially now." It was as though she was in my head. She knew what I wanted to hear, but I could tell that she meant it. I took hold of her hand, and squeezed it.

If I could, I would lay with her forever.


	17. 17

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓸𝓷 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓼𝓱𝓸𝓻𝓮 - 𝓼𝓵𝓸𝔀 𝓼𝓴𝓲𝓮𝓼

The first few months were easy for you.

You felt confident in building a relationship with Eita while he was gone. You figured long distance would be hard, but you knew you could work through it.

Or so you thought.

"I'm not sure if we should keep this up." You couldn't tell if the tone was somber or had no emotion to it whatsoever. This was sudden and a little out of the blue considering he was just telling you the night before how happy he was that he had you.

You couldn't respond. The words were stuck in your throat.

"I think we should just do our own thing right now."

"You gave me the choice to wait for you. I'm willing to do that. You don't want to try to work it out? It's only a year." You tried pleading with what he said to before he left, hoping he'd remember and realize his rash decision to end things was the worst idea.

"It's not that I don't want to, I just don't have a lot of time ..."

You could hear noise from other members behind him, and what sounded like other girls. You suddenly had the feeling in your chest that you had the night you saw him and Aoi together.

"No, it's fine," you cut him off, you could hear the jealousy in your voice, "you made the decisions for us. It's what you clearly want, I'll just follow along."

It was harsh coming from you, trying to make him been bad. But the jealousy was taking over. You couldn't control yourself from saying the first thing that came to your mind.

"Y/n," you could hear the frustration in his voice on the other end of the call, "I don't want this to be one of our last conversations, especially if it's turning into a fight."

"Well you should've thought about that when you decided to end things." You clicked end.

What were you doing? You didn't want to end it on a bad note. But you couldn't help yourself.

Maybe you were just better off staying really good friends.

Your phone started to buzz, interrupting your thought. You knew Eita was calling you back. You turned your phone over and ignored it.

You didn't mean that.

\- - - -

Days started to blend together after graduation. You picked up some more shifts at work. But you hadn't written anything since that conversation with Eita.

The phone calls and texts started to come in less frequently. Every now and again, you debated responding.

You felt as though you were regressing. You didn't want to though. You could feel yourself fighting it as you periodically glanced over some of your work.

I'm better than this. I don't need him to be able to write music.

You stared out your open window. It was a cool night for the middle of summer. A breeze flew through the room, rustling up some of your papers. You rolled out of bed to clean them up.

While gathering up the papers, you noticed one of them saying, for Semi.

It was the song you played for him, still unfinished. You stared it. Part of you wanted to tear it up and throw it out the window. But you couldn't bring yourself to do that. Instead, you pinned it to your board, next to his number you kept pinned to your board as well.

You touched the jeweled heart of your necklace, twirling it around a few times before unclasping it from around your neck. You clipped it back together and hung it on the pin that held up Eita's song.

\- - - -

It was finally winter again. You stood outside the bar and let out a long breath, watching the cloud stretch until it disappeared.

He would be back soon.

You never stopped thinking about him. But you learned to be your own person without him. You started to write more, and play at more open mics over the past six months. You could feel yourself being a better version of you.

You played with your necklace again. You hadn't worn it since the day you hung it up on your board. However, tonight it felt right to wear it again. You rubbed the heart in-between your finger and thumb, trying to calm yourself. You have been coming to open mics without any problems, until tonight. You felt the nerves take over you. But a smile slowly crept onto your face. You hadn't felt this way in a long time. 

Maybe it was a sign ...


	18. 18

𝓷𝓸𝔀 𝓹𝓵𝓪𝔂𝓲𝓷𝓰 // 𝓲 𝔀𝓲𝓵𝓵 𝓯𝓸𝓵𝓵𝓸𝔀 𝔂𝓸𝓾 𝓲𝓷𝓽𝓸 𝓽𝓱𝓮 𝓭𝓪𝓻𝓴 - 𝓭𝓮𝓪𝓽𝓱 𝓬𝓪𝓫 𝓯𝓸𝓻 𝓬𝓾𝓽𝓲𝓮

We were back earlier than expected.

The last couple of shows were cancelled due to poor weather conditions. We decided to head to the bar once we back in town.

I needed to see her.

I couldn't stop thinking about her the entire ride home. Every mile we drove closer to the city, the more anxious I became. I ended things because I couldn't stand the thought of not being around her. I needed to focus on the band and my music. As self-centered as that might sound, it's the reason I was gone in the first place. Every time I found myself thinking of y/n, I could feel myself slipping. I felt I had to choose between her and music, and I chose music.

But I realized too late that I was happier with her around. I could've had both. My mind just made me think otherwise.

We grabbed our drinks and stayed near the bar, but still in view of the stage. There were a few people performing tonight. It felt like a vacation getting to listen to other people, than being on stage for a change. The bar was a little crowded tonight, and a couple people were buzzing about one of the performers.

She's usually here every other weekend, but I love her music. I heard a passerby say as they took a seat at one of the table tops in front of me and the other band members.

As I went to take a sip of my drink, Kaji slapped my chest with the backside of his hand.

"Semi!" He screamed, "Look who it is!"

My eyes widened. I didn't expect to see y/n here tonight, never mind singing. She didn't seem to hear Kaji since there was background music still playing while she set up. Either that, or she completely ignored him.

She looked incredible. She was dressed in all black, her makeup was a little darker than usual, and her hair fell straight to her waist. As she bent over, I saw a silver glimmer around her neck.

She was wearing it.

The bar started to quiet down as someone announced her name. There were a few cheers from the crowd, including the few people that were seated in front of me. Is y/n who they were talking about?

As she strummed the first cord, I was immediately fixated on her. It was like seeing a whole new side of y/n. Then, as she sang the first words, a familiar feeling ran through my body. She was singing the song she wrote for me a year ago.

It had been hard not talking to her. I made the stupid decision that it was better for us to be a part and do our own thing until I got back. It was a self-centered of me to think that we were better off that way. I don't blame her for how she handled it. When she wouldn't return my calls or texts, after a while, I figured she moved on. But seeing her now, wearing the necklace I gave her, and singing this song, I selfishly hoped that she still wanted me.

When the song came to an end, she walked off stage, handing her guitar off to someone before walking out of the bar to get some air.

I immediately handed Kaji my drink, trying not to lose sight of her.

As I exited the bar, my breath hit the air in a white cloud.

I ran my hand through my hair. This was fate, it had to be. I didn't want to ruin this again. I look to my right, hoping not to miss her.

"You looking for someone?" The innocent voice came from the other side of me.

I turned around to see y/n, leaning against the building. She pushed herself away, and I could tell she was different. I could hear it in her voice as she sang, the way she spoke to me, but the way she held herself, showed how much she had changed over the past year.

She sauntered over, her eyes never leaving mine and her lips forming a smile.

She laughed as she tugged on the sleeve of my jacket, "Come on, Eita, you really aren't going to you're happy to see me."

Hearing her say my name sent chills through my body.

She brought her hand to my face, it was ice cold, before saying, "because I'm happy to see you."

"Who are you?" I

Before I gave her time to answer me, I bent down and kissed her. Her arms wrapped around my neck, pulling me in closer for a deeper kiss. My arms drew her in as close as they would let me.

"I missed you, Eita, and I'm sorry." Y/n brought you hands from my neck and rested her palms on my jawline, while her fingers gently touched my face. She stood on her tip toes, trying to keep herself as close as she possibly could to me.

I lowered myself so we were face-to-face, keeping my hands on the back of her neck. I held her there so she wouldn't look away from me.

"No, I'm sorry," I said eagerly, "I've regretted ever telling you we were better off a part."

Her eyes started to glisten, and I could see the tears start to well up. But she kept her smile.

"Y/n, I missed you the entire time I was gone."

It was the truth. She was the only one I thought about. I wanted to get back to her as soon as I could. I wanted to fix everything with her - so I could keep her around as long as I possibly could.

"Eita," y/n sighed, "I love you."

I brought her in close to my chest. To hear those words, made my heart race. I wasn't expecting her to say what I had been feeling.

"I love you, too."


End file.
